TV: Why Smash is better than Glee

Posted on by 20poorandfabulous
Image via nbc.com

I’m not a huge fan of theater shows on TV, because I’ve never watched one that seemed anything more than an overblown and out of proportion take on how people in theater act in “real life.” It’s also almost always done in a really campy, not relatable way that people who have never been in theater don’t understand.

Of course I’m sure we’ve all met people who have been in or are in theater. Sure they are a little quirky, but isn’t anyone in a creative industry quirky? However, not ALL of them are crazy weirdos like those creeps on Glee. (Read a good explanation as to why Glee sucks here) Don’t even get me started on the absolute shit hole that is Glee. Smash is nothing like Glee. 

Hahahaha. Image via sodahead.com

First of all, I’m surprised at how well casted this show is. Anjelica Houston, Debra Messing, Katharine McPhee, Megan Hilty and the whole gang were all really good choices. It seems at any moment if you were to run into one of the characters in real life, that they would actually exist as human beings and be believable. Rachel Berry and company on the other hand…

Second, the show takes musical theater on Broadway to a more human level. None of the characters are decidedly so far off the spectrum quirky or “too” theater, whatever that means. The actresses vying for the role of Marilyn on Smash are hard working gals living in NYC who are immersed or trying to break into the acting world. That sounds realistic. And the writers, choreographers and producers seem relatively honest portrayals of professionals in the theater biz as well. They aren’t trying to ruin each others lives (yet) in what seem like cheap and easy, not to mention repetitive, story lines with horrible acting. (I hate Glee.)

All in all, Smash is the least self indulgent theater show I’ve ever seen on television. They’re not (yet) selling an album full of songs that are shittier than the original to everyone with too much expendable income. Basically, Glee is sloppy television and product marketing at its absolute finest; Smash is a tv show (with less obvious marketing) about musical theater in NYC. If I have to pick a show about theater on TV, Imma go with the latter.

Macy Gray covers Yeah Yeah Yeahs “Maps” and others for new album

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Wtf?!

I guess Macy Gray is releasing an album of covers. Today on the indie radio station I was blessed enough to listen to Macy’s cover of “Maps” and… it was pretty bad. It’s not TERRIBLE, but when you take a song as truly magnificent and emotional as “Maps”, you can’t just simply put some garageband beat to it and distort the voice. That’s not a cover, that’s a cover up.

Image via hiphollywood.com

Nice try, Macy Gray. You can preview it over at Amazon. She covers Radiohead, Kanye, Arcade Fire and some others that I can’t recall just from the title of the song. But what I hear from the 10 second previews is that it does not look good. Weird conceptual takes on awesome songs that now just sound wrong, like the spirit of the songs has been sucked out and replaced with simple beats.

I could pretty much only hear this album being played in mall hair salons, where all the young girls have really shitty haircuts and who have never heard of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs.

Macy Gray has a really unique, interesting voice. But I’ve always felt that after her one really big hit song, “I Try,” that she’s never really found her niche genre or even her calling in music. It’s unsettling as a listener to not know what kind of direction or genre she’s shooting for because it’s really not apparent in her work. She’d be a great residency artist, like in a piano bar or something. But in terms of releasing CDs, I just don’t really know why or how somebody keeps paying for her albums to keep getting made.

Maybe there’s a huge Macy Gray market somewhere outside of Ohio and in some country like Turkey. Or maybe somebody got sign happy in the early 00’s and gave her like a 7 CD deal. Odd.

Listen: “Chair” by Big Deal

Posted on by 20poorandfabulous

This song is like, a cigarette and a nice cocktail buzz on a shitty plastic lawn chair on a really hot summer day.

Jennie and Peter F divorce.

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You'll be okay, Kelly Taylor. Image via mymissus.tumblr.com

For the first time ever, I didn’t feel ultimately crushed by another celebrity divorce. I actually sighed a sigh of relief for Jennie, and I have no idea why because I don’t necessarily like or dislike Jennie or Peter. It was more because two people were married, had children, were happy and then separated. After a really long separation, they decided to divorce.

Normally, I feel sad about yet another Hollywood breakup. But this one was different. Peter and Jennie weren’t all over the tabloids for their entire weak ass relationship like Katy Perry and Russell Brand, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries, Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore, etc.

Image via exposay.com

P and J had kids, were quietly being human beings somewhere in California and were married for 11 years. Marriage years in Hollywood are like dog years. So they were technically together for 77 years. And then they figured out that they couldn’t be together anymore. It happens. And at least this time there was a lot of thought and consideration involved instead of an 18 million dollar paycheck, Kim. 

I’m happy for Peter and Jennie. Starting anew. Good for them. I mean, after so much thought put into their divorce, one can only assume this decision will make them both happier people. To say that love is a mystery is an understatement. We go in and out of lives, love, lust and loss. and that’s life. It’s beautiful, beautifully hard but its ours and we gotta get through it.

So, Jennie and Peter, I dedicate Daniel Bedingfield’s “Gotta Get Through This” to both of you. You can do it.

Netflix nightcap: Me Without You

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Image via cahiersducinemode.wordpress.com

Michelle Williams rarely ever picks a bad movie. Every movie I’ve ever seen with MW has been amazing. Blue Valentine, Wendy and Lucy, Brokeback Mountain, etc. Gurlfriend knows how to pick a flick.

Me Without You is another one of those pesky Netflix movies that always shows up but never gets watched. I didn’t know it was from 2001, until I saw Michelle Williams pre-waif, pre-Heath and pre-huge fame.

Image via reelingreviews.com

The movie centers around two neighbor best friends. They grow up through the 70s, 80s, 90s and end in 2001. I liked the movie, but that’s a whole lotta life and time to condense into 100 minutes. It doesn’t feel like it moves too fast, but it does feel like some individual character development gets lost in the story arc of the friendship. The friendship IS the movie, but it’s kind of like meeting a couple or “bestfriends*. You meet these weird, connected human beings and you never really get to know them individually besides some obvious characteristics.

It was definitely nice to watch a movie about two gal pals that wasn’t steeped in bullshit situations and lame dudes named shit like “Chip” or “Kevin” who are 25 and still talk about “the big game” because that was the peak of their life. The acting was solid, but what else do you expect from our girl Michelle?!

Yup. Been there. Image via cahiersducinemode.wordpress.com

If you’re feeling nostalgic about yesteryear, even if you weren’t alive in the 70s, watch it. There are some great girl moments including dressing up in trashbags in the forest, after leaving our parents homes of course, to look hip for a “cool party”. We’ve all donned some pretty crazy shit trying to look cool. If you’re not feeling good for a friendship drama that takes place mostly in the 70s/80s, skip it.

Nevertheless, the clothing is amazing. It’s crazy shit, but like the over the top kind of crazy that involves heroin and blow with a shot ton of tulle and fishnets. Stella McCartney for Chloé is to thank for the fashion in the film.

Sidenote: I’ve learned that Netflix has very weird copywriters who write the descriptions, because the descripts are always weird and not really that jiving with the film. I need to keep reminding myself that whoever is writing this shit ain’t workin too hard.

Jennifer Lawrence looks fierce at the Hunger Games premiere

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WHY HAVEN’T I GOTTEN TICKETS YET?!

Here’s Jennifer Lawrence looking all sorts of smoldering at the HG premiere. This movie is gonna rock so hard. But maybe it’s a good thing I don’t have tickets yet, I hate feeling so unspecial in crowded places. “PEETA IS BETTER THAN GALE YOU IDIOT! (breaks annoying 9 year old’s arm and her shitty mom’s nose for saying Gale is the best, gets sent to jail and misses the movie with no refunded ticket)” Maybe waiting until the crowd dies down is a smart life choice.

Image via the Superficial

Courtney Stodden has a website. This exists now. Great.

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PLEASE put a sweater on and go to college!!! Oy vey. Image via zimbio.com

OH LORD. Actually it’s not really a big deal. There are websites where women eat poo on camera and omelettes made from bodily fluids. I’ll take a little Courtney Stodden self-promotion any day over those pervert atrocities.

First of all, SHE WAS BORN IN 1994. That sounds way too young for someone to be half naked on a website. When I was 17 I was burning a hole in the road with my Harry Potter cloak. The kids these days, I tell ya.

Second of all, she describes herself as an “actress, model, pop artist.” Yeah, and I’m a professional couch enthusiast with a presidential penchant for eating dinner in front of the TV. She might as well change her description to “professional famehussy.” Burnt!

Better yet, if you’re a sad, bald, overweight lonely sociopath with agoraphobia, you can become a VIP member over at her website. Goody!

Olivia Munn might be the coolest hot chick eva

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Oh Olivia. I think I'M in love with you now. Image via huffingtonpost.com

Olivia Munn responds to alleged nude photos of her that were leaked:

March 9, 2012

Dear Everyone at “The Babymakers” SXSW screening:

I’m sorry I couldn’t be there with you all. I’m currently in Sierra Leone helping build wells for the thirsty. I thought I’d have time to stop through Austin on my way here, but I was detoured when I saw two beached seals on the Gulf near South Padre and used all of my strength, sweat and tears to pull them back into the water and save their lives.

(NOTE to JAY- Hold for applause and gasps. About 2 solid minutes…)

So, I come to you only in this letter, by way of my director of “The Babymakers” Jay Chandra-shay… shay- Jay Chandra-something.

It’s hard for me to sit here with these small, dysentery-ridden children and know that I cannot be there, with all of you wonderful friends and supporters, for my SXSW Hollywood movie premiere.

I must end this letter short, as I’m on my way to Seoul, Korea to speak with the starving children who have been denied food by their country and educate them on a motto that I have personally lived by and think will give them some hope: Thinner is Better.

I pray this letter finds you well and God keeps you safe.

Oh, and one last thing- Some of those pictures weren’t even me. I mean, you can’t even see my penis… and it’s pretty big for an Asian. Sheesh.

Til next we meet again…

Sincerely,
Your Cable Television Darling (from the upcoming HBO Aaron Sorkin series, “The Newsroom”),
Olivia Munn

Love her!! Hot and funny is the coolest combination ever. Just ask Kristen Wiig.

Netflix nightcap: The Romantics

Posted on by 20poorandfabulous

The Romantics is a movie about a group of college friends reuniting for a wedding. A long burning love triangle makes things a little sticky and that’s basically the whole movie. That and a bunch of “we’re college friends” shit. Katie Holmes does a believable acting job, so good for her. I don’t much care for Josh Duhamel. He seems like a pretty face with not a whole lot of depth of character. Malin Ackerman was good too.

Image via goldcage.blogspot.com

As for the movie itself, it inches along without very much happening. 60 minutes go by and you still feel like it’s the first 20. The people are pretty, but none of the characters are really all that lovable and they don’t have any redeeming qualities whatsoever. Also, the story dwells on the obvious themes of relationship dramz between every friend in every possible way for way too long. Bleg. We get it! Everyone is horny for their friends because they’re not adult enough to not want to rub up against other shitty people.

With a few different cast change ups, the movie maybe would have faired better. Although I can’t really tell if it’s some of the cast that is blah or just the characters themselves that are so mootly unlikable that is the problem. They don’t even really seem to like each other that much.

I am definitely biased against witnessing annoying friends that only talk about how they all used to be such good friends. Almost as annoying as the entire How I Met Your Mother series. I fucking hate that show. Nothing is as annoying as HIMYM though. So hooray for The Romantics!

I’d suggest falling asleep to this movie. Otherwise, skip it for sure.

Forever Young: Bruce Jenner

Posted on by 20poorandfabulous

Bruce Jenner: Gold medalist, jokester, Kardashian step-patriarch/Jenner patriarch, motivational speaker, reality star and jubilant soul.

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