In defense of Ted Mosby

RADNOR

I get it. You hate Ted Mosby. His obsession with finding “the one” and confessing his love within 5 minutes of meeting any pretty girl who doesn’t have the personality of a bag of rocks is a little infuriating. His romantic style is definitely annoying to the point where many people couldn’t watch the show because they hated him so much. I used to be one of those people. But now I’m not. Right before the series finale, I must admit: I kinda like Ted Mosby. Stay with me.

  1. It is so fucking easy to be cynical. Suspiciously too easy. Ted may have had his moments of hopelessness when it came to finding love, but he never actually gave up. As stupid as it sounds, we need people like that who keep reminding us that magic could exist, if only we could just stop being pessimistic, horrible cool kids.
  2. He tried everything. I just went through the series for the first time this year after years of “ew, no.”  After a couple of seasons, a pattern of spontaneity emerged in Ted. Sure, it’s insane that he jumps the gun on any possible romantic moment that could ever be squeezed out of a crusty turd, but god dammit, the kid’s got spunk. If you ever needed someone to do something insane with, he’d probably be there with you.
  3. He’s probably a freak in bed. I said that to a friend the other day and they were begging me to stop the imagery. Whatever. Ted has slept with so many people, he’s had to have picked up some good moves. Or a couple of STIs because he slept around a LOT. Either way, All Adventurous Women Do. You do you, Ted.
  4. He’s a really good friend. He would do anything for any of his friends. Like, probably hide a dead body or not tell the police that you set your ex’s mailbox on fire. That’s respectable.
  5. He has a job. He’s probably got a savings account you could steal from when you tell him you love him and he proposes a joint checking after like a week.
  6. He’s not totally disgusting. Inside OR out, he’s a pretty alright dude if you can get past the incessant soulmate searching. But really, maybe people hate him so much because we’ve all got a little Ted Mosby living inside of us, wishing that a soulmate existed and that we would find them someday, and it would be the coolest day of our lives.

how-i-met-your-mother-group-bar-main

I haven’t watched any of season 9 of How I Met Your Mother, because binge watching is so much more fun than week to week. But for those of you who are watching the final episode live tonight on TV, I hope the episode is everything you dreamed a series ending and an insanely long love saga would be.

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Netflix nightcap: The Romantics

The Romantics is a movie about a group of college friends reuniting for a wedding. A long burning love triangle makes things a little sticky and that’s basically the whole movie. That and a bunch of “we’re college friends” shit. Katie Holmes does a believable acting job, so good for her. I don’t much care for Josh Duhamel. He seems like a pretty face with not a whole lot of depth of character. Malin Ackerman was good too.

Image via goldcage.blogspot.com

As for the movie itself, it inches along without very much happening. 60 minutes go by and you still feel like it’s the first 20. The people are pretty, but none of the characters are really all that lovable and they don’t have any redeeming qualities whatsoever. Also, the story dwells on the obvious themes of relationship dramz between every friend in every possible way for way too long. Bleg. We get it! Everyone is horny for their friends because they’re not adult enough to not want to rub up against other shitty people.

With a few different cast change ups, the movie maybe would have faired better. Although I can’t really tell if it’s some of the cast that is blah or just the characters themselves that are so mootly unlikable that is the problem. They don’t even really seem to like each other that much.

I am definitely biased against witnessing annoying friends that only talk about how they all used to be such good friends. Almost as annoying as the entire How I Met Your Mother series. I fucking hate that show. Nothing is as annoying as HIMYM though. So hooray for The Romantics!

I’d suggest falling asleep to this movie. Otherwise, skip it for sure.

Movies: happythankyou moreplease

ugh. Photo: IMDB
ugh. Photo: IMDB

Ah, the indie film on Netflix instant. It’s always a hit or miss. This one, “happythankyoumoreplease,” is definitely a miss. I mean, just look at that post-modern title. One word. No spaces. Over it!

The movie proved to be good background noise though. And Ted from How I Met Your Mother is in it, which is good to know he’s trying to branch out because I’ve never seen him in anything else.

Rough Synopsis

There’s a lost foster kid in the movie, who goes home with Josh Radnor’s character, who is a failed writer. (The failed writer bit is getting old in movies, don’t you think?) His friend with alopecia played by Malin Ackerman is hot but insecure, and her ex-boyfriend is a jerkwad. Other people have relationship dramz, the kid gets returned a la “Big Daddy” and the movie ends with Kate Mara badly lip-synching a bad song in a dark bar.

So? 

Buster, we miss you.
Buster, we miss you.

The acting was totally fine. And the plot was ok too. But it didn’t really seem to pull at any heart strings or go much of anywhere besides the thought that sometimes life is a little hard.

Buster from Arrested Development is in it also, but sadly not playing Buster.

All in all, “happythankyoumoreplease” wasn’t the worst movie I’ve ever seen. Which is probably “Thankskilling.” Look it up.