What the fuck! This is awesome. I wanna hang out with this guy and just MAKE stuff. It wouldn’t even matter if it was just paper cutouts of snowflakes that we pasted Ashley Olsen/Michelle Tanner’s face on and called them “Snow Rudes” or something. Oh wait that’s the middle sister Stephanie’s line, right? Who cares.
This is one of my favorite songs ever. Very fitting for the new year.
I always thought this was Savage Garden!
The Swedes really know how to do pop music. That is their thing. I will worship them forever. I’m absolutely not kidding. Robyn, MAX MARTIN?!?!?! If you don’t know who Max Martin is, he is the man who has produced nearly ever number one hit in America in the past 20 years. There is something in the water in that country that breeds awesome fucking people, beauty, and amazing, out-of-this-WORLD pop music. Expect a compilation of the best pop music of Sweden in the neartime future.
Cuz I’m wine drunk on a Wednesday. This song RULES.
Oh dear. By now you’ve either read all the horrible reviews of Liz and Dick, or you’ve actually seen the movie and know what’s what. Well, here are my thoughts.
movies too!
It is starting to feel gross making fun of Lindsay Lohan. This was the best she could do, and a pretty accurate view of why she was even filming a Lifetime movie in the first place. However, it is crucial to note that an equal amount of blame for this bad Lifetime movie should fall on the writers, producers and director. Regardless of the actors, Liz and Dick is a steaming pile all on its own without Lindsay’s wobbly star power to reel in the ratings.
Sidenote: gross, Danielle Fishel. Topanga has suddenly found her star reignited, so she made a spoof of Lindsay’s Liz on The Soup. It’s almost like making fun of Britney post head-shaving. Not cool bitch. Nobody was thinking of you a week ago, and now you’re shitting on a crazy actress with substance abuse problems who hits Floridan psychics?! Ugh, get off your Disney channel high horse you turd!
Watch me eat every single bad word I have ever said about Taylor Swift. Her latest album Red is pretty much the best album I’ve heard in a very long time. Sure, she’s got a weird and crazy love life. But she knows how to make amazing records from it (and to be fair, every celebrity and human being has a fucked up love life).
The thing I’ve come to realize in liking Taylor Swift’s Red is that she is arguably the most talented person in pop music right now. Nuff said.
Red is an eclectic mix of alt rock, pop and a little bit of country. She channels U2, then Stevie Nicks, then maybe a little Regina Spektor, then Katy Perry. And the cool thing is that it never feels tired or contrived. It’s bold and honest and still really fun. It’s the album any pop star would kill to put out, because she drew inspiration across MANY genres but made it work like the baddest bitch ever. I want to close the doors to my room and do some soul-searching/dancing to this album, because that’s how good it is. I shouldn’t be surprised that it’s good, it’s just that I’m surprised that I love it so much already. This is her best album to date and I cannot stress how good this album is. Do yourself a favor and get it.
Here are some really noteworthy tracks, although to be honest the entire album is comprised of noteworthy tracks.
“All Too Well” is alleged to be about Jake Gyllenhaal, and holy shit. It cuts pretty deep. “Maybe we got lost in translation/ maybe I asked for too much/ but maybe this thing was a masterpiece til you tore it all up” and “you call me up again just to break me like a promise/so casually cruel in the name of being honest/I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here/ because I remember it all too well.” Ok, girlfriend is fucking growing up, and I am fangirling the shit out of her 20 something love life songs like a new Spice Girls album release in the 90s. This song is amazing.
Um. Yeah. That’s Taylor Swift doing Katy Perry better than Katy Perry. This song is gonna be fucking HUGE. The melodies are spot on and remind me of late 90s/early 00s pop music. This song is baller af.
This is her U2 inspired song. And it totally fucking works.
This song is really sweet and reminds me of early Sheryl Crow for some reason.
GO TO HER WEBSITE. WATCH AND LISTEN. WHO SAID THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? Oh, dear God. The quiet, festering death crash and burn of this new Ashlee Simpson album is going to be insane. There’s a countdown on her website. Last time I checked, anyone my age who listened to Ashlee Simpson in the confusing days of high school does not ever listen to her anymore. Not even as a joke. This girl is so uncool that nobody would even be listening ironically (i hate that sentence, but you know it’s true).
EVIDENCE this will blow
She got caught lip-synching on SNL (which is the first thing that pops up on youtube after you type her name in), and by the way it is painful every time to watch. She used to have a reality tv show on MTV. She was married to and then divorced to Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy who hasn’t really done anything musically in yeeeears. She had a baybay. Two years ago, She was rumored to be working on a folk album. A FOLK ALBUM. A nose job, a short haircut. WHO IDENTIFIES WITH YOU. She seriously might be a sociopath. Think about it: if she was actually cool, then she’d know that she isn’t cool. The more you know.
I’m three listens into Stereolab’s “Emperor Tomato Ketchup” (1996) and it gets better with every turn. The name of the song sounds silly, I know. Until you listen and the pretty french vocals come in over the video gamey-surfer-synth and make you feel like you’re 4 champagnes in on a technicolor beach.
The rest of the album is that cool too. I’m listening to the entire album as I type, which is confusingly titled Emperor Tomato Ketchup (until I googled that name shit cuz I ain’t no hella lazy bitch). They get the album title from a 1971 Japanese film titled:
This album upon first listen sounds like something I should have known my whole life. Maybe just because it sounds like a mix of things I’ve heard before, but different and lovingly familiar at the same time. It’s chill yet energetic. I can’t even pick favorite songs yet, that’s how good it is. Listen to the entire album here while you’re hanging around sometime. It’s totally fucking worth it.
I think this family is going to make an impact on the average Joe of America. Think about it: they are not a glamorous representation of society a la RHOWhatever. They are self-described rednecks who live very average lives in the south, but have a tv show because they are charming and into pageantry. My thought is that any redneck/southerner/generally horrible person who is a homophobe but has a knack for reality TV on TLC (which is a little gay), might identify with these folks and become a more accepting, better part of society. We can only hope.
Honey Boo Boo God save the South.
Oh my god. Wait until the woman kicks in, you will most definitely know some version of the song, whether it be from the original (as far as I can tell) 1977 version or the Janet Jackson and Shaggy version (yikes, what a combo). Either way, I knew this song from the Shaggy/JJ recording and was pleasantly surprised to discover, like most songs from the 90s, that it had a couple predecessors that far outreached the latter version’s potential. The chorus is one of those rare batches of perfection, because it is so recognizable and has been sampled like a snack tray at your rich cousins wedding. This shit stands the test of time.
Off topic:
Fuck Janet Jackson for not being in the “Luv Me Luv Me” video with Shaggy. I mean, I get it. It IS Shaggy. But Shaggy was a legend for like ALL of middle school. I guess karma served her due to the fact that she hasn’t had a hit (that I can remember) since “All For You“, which is a great song but an awkward, very dated music video. I cringe at early aught video concepts, i.e. “super-fly urban gals” and “holy shit, millennium robots!” and money wasted on suuuuuper dumb effects that were probably really cool then but just make us uncomfortable now. However, I’m sort of glad our awkward, preteen years over the turn of the millennium were coupled with an awkward society in general.
2PF 
