I wasn’t SUPER SUPER impressed with a lot of what was in Prabal Gurung’s line for Target. It was all colorful and fun, but you’ve gotta hold back a little on the fun when you’re working with cheap materials, otherwise it starts to look TOO FUN i.e. 7th grade future hooker. BUT I LOVED the shirtdress and had to buy it. It looks so perfect on. The faux leather collar is really what sold me. That and the colors. And the fact that it’s February and we need to spend money to feel something.
Anyways, this dress is awesome.
Image via target.com
However, this skirt looked cheap as fuck. The print is rad but there’s just something about a bottom of lace that kills me in bad ways.
Image via target.com
This was also really ugly on the rack. Maybe it’s one of those shirts that looks good on. Probably not though.
Image via target.com
This looks really cute although I did not see it in stores.
HOLY SHIT. HOLY FUCKING MOTHER OF A SHIT. Yes. Yes it’s true. Stupid TLC doesn’t have full eps of one of the most brilliant “hey, make yourself feel better by shopping and not looking like shit!” shows ever, What Not to Wear. But have no fear: a simple google search between a bored and tired roommate/bff will uncover a HOT LOAD of amazing hot mess for us all to watch from our sweatpants pristine outfits and old boxed wine nightly cocktails. Because really, it’s better to be on the observational side of constructively bitchy than on the horrible, plaid corduroy downward spiral that is being 32.
This guy coulda used some MAJOR Thairapy. Image via blog.ivman.com
Do you ever feel like things in your life are just a little bit off? Your roots are showing, you hate your clothes more than anything in the world, and cameltoe jokes just don’t make you laugh anymore. I’ve got the solution: Thairapy. A combination of a hair stylist and a therapist to really dig deep into your postmodern woes and better yet, fill your goddamn roots.
I have no idea if this shit exists. It should. I bet it could have in the 90s. Because really, a hair stylist is sort of a therapist. They ask you questions about your life while they’re touching your head, and for some reason this physical contact coupled with the life inquiries causes you to spill anything and everything to your stylist.
She’d be first in line for this shit, no doubt. I LOVE HER. Image via hdofblog.com
It helps that most hair stylists are chatty and like to keep the conversation going while they deal with your split-end situation, but what if our hair stylists were also licensed therapists? We could go in for highlights, a brow wax, and a little existential cleansing. I’m not talking heavy-hitting therapy sessions for people with legitimate weekly therapy sessions, but more like a little check-in with a licensed professional for the rest of us. Think of the breakthroughs! Think of the daring haircuts! “Do you feel like having short hair?” “What do you think this hair color means for your life?” “Your ends are telling me you’ve had a bad month.”
I think we carry so much of who we are and how we feel in our hair and our appearance in general. Constant maintenance or lack thereof for our friendly follicles can really say a lot about where we are in our lives. Craving a new ‘do? Maybe you’re craving a change of scene IRL. Split ends from the past 3 years? What are you holding onto? It could be that some people are just lazy or OCD with their hair, but maybe there lies a little more beneath the surface than just a new cut and color. Who better to dive in that someone who already helps you look and feel amazing? I WANT THIS SERVICE NOW. COME ON AMERICA.
Fur is the shit. There’s something that changes you when you put on a fur. Lights feel brighter, wine tastes better, and if anyone gets in your way they’re like half scared that you’re a prostitute with a switch blade.
I have a rabbit fur coat that I got from Savers in Rochester (MN). It’s second hand fabulous. There are a couple of seam rips and the thing sheds like a dog, but I can’t give it up because some rabbits died and why waste their sacrificed life wearing a fucking Columbia jacket and looking like a bad tipper.
And yeah, every time I think about how a REAL fur coat is made, I feel bad. I love animals. But I also eat meat and live in the waaaaay far north where a fur coat is actually used for it’s warmth. The added coat fierceness is a bonus. But either way, eating meat, wearing fur, having poor asian peasants make our iPhones for 8 cents so we can find the nearest Taco Hut; this world is fucked and we are big assholes. But that’s why faux fur exists: so you can only kind of be a dick human being, instead of a slightly bigger dick of a person. Progress.
She will be the most fabulous tween ever. Look at her faux fur! and she’s only what, 6?! Look out Willow Smith, this gal is already a supa star, and she hasn’t even hit double digits. Love her!
Way back when nobody had even heard of a Gaga, our Lady Mother Monster was a brunette. She was running around Lollapalooza in lingerie and big brown hair. But, as fate would have it, Amy Winehouse also had a similar look at the time AND was a bigger star. Gaga needed to change her look, which led to the blonde Gaga with the bow made of hair that we all loved and adored.
She looks so wonderfully Italian and human in this photo, which is refreshing because pop stars’ looks are starting to get very overwhelming (I’m lookin’ at you, Ke$ha and Nicki Minaj). That Gaga, always ahead of the trends! Also, her all-black outfit makes me crave September and all the wonderful fall goodness that comes with the changing seasons.
TIP: If you are a dyed blonde looking to go brown like Gaga for fall, take it to a professional. My hair turned green once at the tips because it wasn’t taking the color. Fucking up your hair sucks, so spend the money and save the emotional distress!
Girl’s got a great aesthetic. She’s an H&M model, a new artist on the scene with a retro vibe, and a totally hot babe. I like 3 of her songs from her debut album “Born to Die”. Summertime Sadnessis my jam right now, because fall is sooooo almost here and I’m over summer and all its philandering ways. In my quest to reevaluate my lukewarm feelings towards Lana Del Rey, I decided to do a little more research. Who knows, maybe her ethereal-old timey Nancy Sinatra angle just needed some time to seep in. Maybe not.
Image from Buzzfeed
In my research, I came across this article on Buzzfeed called “26 Meanest Quotes From Reviews of Lana Del Rey’s ‘Born to Die.‘” They’re not so much mean as they are a “what the fuck, commercial industry?! If you’re gonna push some shit in our face, make it better than… this.” She really does have an opposing magnets vibe. Most of her songs are listenable, but listenable isn’t a “HOLY FUCK IF WE DON’T LISTEN TO THIS SONG RIGHT NOW I’M GONNA FUCK YOUR HEAD.” And isn’t that what most mainstream pop music strives for? True, her tunes ain’t dancepopsynthpuke, but the target market is similar. That’s why her entire existence is confusing. You don’t market lukewarm tea to coke addicts. That’s like, marketing 101. You market cocaine to cocaine addicts and lukewarm tea to people who like to stay indoors.
I also wanted to watch her SNL debacle performances again, because I forgot what was so bad about them. Was she standing still too much? Was she pitchy? Was she boring? It’s so much more than that. This person does not look ready to have a career as a mainstream singer. She looks, acts and sings like she’s empty: a shell of a guaranteed faux-indie consumer success. And maybe she is empty. Sometimes we’re all a little empty. What’s weird is that she isn’t using that emptiness in her performance or art, which is the biggest cardinal sin of being an artist: use what’s screwed up about you and turn it into gold. She’s using what she’s not and turning it into ‘meh’. Good plan!
Kind of empty. Image via nydailynews.com
She’s also landed a campaign with H&M for fall 2012. The clothes look good, and again her aesthetic is appealing. But there’s not anything behind her stares. Her poses seems fragile and shy. Maybe in a pop world full of Lady Gaga, Ke$ha, Katy Perry and Nicki Minaj, LDR’s understated image is calculated as some kind of counteract to the exhausting, never-ending motion of the modern pop star. All of the aforementioned pop stars have a clearly defined personality/music/market that we all know and either love or hate. LDR severely lacks personality, spark, that je ne sais quoi that sends the right participants on a one way journey to superstardom.
She seems like a nice girl, someone you would get frozen yogurt with and watch a movie you’ve already seen 100 times. As for being some sort of pop star, we’re still waiting for a personality to emerge from behind the technically beautiful and commercially calculated image that is barely conceivable as human.
“To the fans. i want you to know that I care deeply about your feelings and views, and I will always support your philosophies about life. We’ve been having over-arching conversations about society, equality, and politics for the past five years, and we should continue. I do not however support violent, abusive, and childish campaigns for ANY CAUSE. Particularly one that I respect. “Animal Rights.” I am choosing not to comment on whether or not the furs I purchase are faux fur-pile or real because I would think it hypocritical of me not to acknowledge the python, ostrich, cow hide, leather, lamb, alligator, “kermit” and not to mention meat, that I have already worn. This should already put me in a category as one who appreciates and adores the beauty of animals in fashion, but am not a strict vegan. I have truly always stayed away from skinned fur, especially i have never been able to afford a nice one, but this does not mean my morals are rigid and that I won’t bend at the sight of an absolute art piece of a coat. I have no chains about this. You see a carcass, I see a museum pièce de résistance. But I am truly sorry to fans who are upset by this, its a fair and applaudable feeling about the health and safety of animals. I respect your views, please respect mine.
And to campaigners, Save your flour to make bread for the children who are hungry. And Kim Kardashian is fabulous.” -Lady Gaga on littlemonsters.com
Amen Sista! As a fur lover (faux and second-hand real because let’s get real here, real fur is expensive, and rightfully so), it’s nice to hear someone say something honest about wearing fur. And the last part is awesome about saving flour to feed hungry children. Classic. That’s the thing about PETA that has always baffled me, is that they are using threatening behavior and violence to bring about a point of non-violence towards animals. It’s hypocritical to the life they wish all humans to lead, one of non-violence towards all beings. If we can’t stop being dicks to fellow humans, our own kind, will we ever be able to curb our dickery with other species? It’s a question for the ages here people.
UPDATE:
It’s being reported that this is a fake letter and not actually from Ke$ha, but it’s from SOMEONE who wanted to get lots of press from it. And that someone is probably a festering vegan turd over at PETA:
Image via operationgaga.com
“I can be reached through PETA’s Senior VP…” Smug much! And kind of the whistle blower to the whole fake letter theory. Like anyone wants to talk to a higher up at PETA. They’d probably throw red paint on you just for interrupting their lunch of dried oats and frail greens.
Gaga isn’t taking this bashing lightly, and she’s even trolling the press and PETA supporters with this little delight:
Image via littlemonsters.com
Hilarious. This is gonna get real good. Those PETA motherfuckers don’t back down. I will not be surprised at whatever violent tactics they partake in next. Let’s just hope they don’t pass out from too much exertion.
Remember those red framed glasses? And her AMAZING talk show? I don’t know why, but that show was my shit when I was a kid. It was too humid in Kansas summers to go outside and play anyways. She had awesome, 90s ma/grandma style that always felt kinda exciting.
As for those ICONIC red glasses, SJR spilled to Oprah a while back:
“I couldn’t see the teleprompter. So I saw an ad that said, ‘We do a Pap smear and give you red glasses.’ They were going to trade me up [to a better pair]. I said: ‘You’re not going to trade me up. I don’t have that kind of money.’ It’s all they had for $19.95.”
That makes me like her even more. Taking care of her lady parts, AND getting inexpensive (and awesome) frames. Gotta love it. Fierce bitches on a budget ain’t gotta spend big dollaz to look fresh. She’s like the true essence of 20poorandfabulous. I will be forever grateful.
Holy shit. These are way better than those light up atrocities strange kids used to wear in middle school. Reminicent of Doc Martens circa 95. The wheels are retractable too! Drive in workers at Sonic just got a lot more fashionable.
2PF 
