Shit’s gettin ice cold baby. Image via dennismpls.bandcamp.com
This is the music project I’ve been working on for a year! Here is the first single, “In for the Kill”. It’s about fucking someone who is empty and kinda dead inside. Which we’ve all probably dealt with. It’s a surprisingly protective feeling though. You just want to make them feel alive despite their own wishes not to be. (And then you get over it because ain’t nobody got time for that!)
Here is the link to the Dennisbandcamp page in case you want to hear the whole EP. Bedroom made electropop from the midwest. Get wild.
Image via celeblowdown.com. What the fuck look is she going for here.
GO TO HER WEBSITE. WATCH AND LISTEN. WHO SAID THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? Oh, dear God. The quiet, festering death crash and burn of this new Ashlee Simpson album is going to be insane. There’s a countdown on her website. Last time I checked, anyone my age who listened to Ashlee Simpson in the confusing days of high school does not ever listen to her anymore. Not even as a joke. This girl is so uncool that nobody would even be listening ironically (i hate that sentence, but you know it’s true).
EVIDENCE this will blow
She got caught lip-synching on SNL (which is the first thing that pops up on youtube after you type her name in), and by the way it is painful every time to watch. She used to have a reality tv show on MTV. She was married to and then divorced to Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy who hasn’t really done anything musically in yeeeears. She had a baybay. Two years ago, She was rumored to be working on a folk album. A FOLK ALBUM. A nose job, a short haircut. WHO IDENTIFIES WITH YOU. She seriously might be a sociopath. Think about it: if she was actually cool, then she’d know that she isn’t cool. The more you know.
I don’t know how I feel about Xtina’s new song “Your Body”. It’s not horrible by any means, because it sounds just like most things on the radio right now, without autotune because baby gurl has that shit built in. But it’s not a “holy shit, that’s my new jam” kind of song. The hook is alright but forgettable, because as I am writing this post I forgot the name of the song and any melody it had. Not that I have an amazing memory, but still. If this song is any indication of her new album, we might be in a similar situation to her previous album fiasco Bionic.
PLZ FIND INSPIRATION TO BE GREAT AGAIN. Image via youknowyoucare.com
I just don’t get what she’s doing. If you have a voice like Christina Aguilera, you need to pick songs worthy of Christina Aguilera’s voice, not something Ke$ha took a next-morning-whiskey shit on and then passed over. Of course I’m exaggerating because the song isn’t THAT bad, but it’s not up to the standard that we all have in our head of Christina Aguilera. Remember Beautiful, or anything she did before Bionic? That shit was gold because it had personality. But lately it’s like she’s chasing trends that started 5 years ago, and it is NOT working in her favor. Diva legends don’t chase old trends; they hire talented enough people to create their next award-winning image for them create new ones. Xtina isn’t doing herself any favors by picking songs that are infinitely forgettable.
Where’d her Stripped passion go? Shit, even Back to Basics? Did being rich and comfortable ruin her ability to put out a good album? Or is she just an amazing voice with little artistic fury? Only time will tell. But if personality-disordered Britney can put out AMAZING fucking albums AND be on a TV show just like Xtina (what is this, 1999 again?), then I just don’t know about this girl.
(And please, there is no way there is an Xtina Britney feud because of their “warring” shows. Our Princess of Pop Brit-Brit is too medicated to give a shit about mostly everything.)
Seriously, FUCK Lana Del Rey. If Britney Spears, the famous lip-syncer and mental breakdown lady can sound amazing LIVE on SNL, then anyone should. Watch is. She’s AMAZING! There’s just something about her that you can’t look away from. Lana del Rey just kind of stood there too, and everyone was like “what the fuck bitch!” But when Brit Brit stands there the entire song, singing live, you just stare at her. Je ne sais quoi to the max.
But for real, this gives me hope that someday we may have a Britney back that is more involved in performance and music career. Watching her on the X Factor is weird, because she has psychological issues that leave her in a conservatorship where she can’t make any life decisions on her own. But she’s judging a HUGE talent competition like the X Factor? It just seems kind of weird. Almost like all the people surrounding her, even though they have her off the street drugs and on the prescribed ones, are exploiting her name and face for millions of dollars. Sometimes I just don’t know what to think about our B. Spears. I love her to death, but her life is fucking insane.
GOD DAMN do I love Robyn. She is so fucking awesome and authentic, which is a strange combo for such a famous and amazing pop star. I would definitely want this girl on my side in a fight. Or to talk to about a breakup. Or anything really, because she’s that fucking cool.
Me being lame as fuck, I only had her album “Body Talk Pt 1” and self-titled “Robyn.” In a fit of boredom genius, I decided I should finally download the second installment of her Body Talk albums. It’s similar to “Body Talk Pt 1” obviously, but just as fucking good.
I also LOVE In My Eyes. It sounds so fresh. Like cucumbers and sequins. Robyn is the fucking SHIT.
I’m not sure how this has flown under my radar. But shit, the 24 hour news cycle coupled with trying to get laid really narrows a girl’s news intake. Plus I don’t really read Perez anymore. All the positivity makes me disgruntled.
First of all: Lady Gaga, our dear leader, has reportedly cast Lindsay Lohan in an upcoming music video. It makes a lot of sense actually, considering that Gaga’s entire career theme is playing the part of a pop star. Now she has allegedly cast one of Hollywoods greatest-still-living trainwrecks in a music video, probably to play some kind of “tragic” persona as well, which obviously isn’t a stretch for Ms. Lohan.
Image via littlemonsters.com
Anyways, it seems like a strange career move for Lady Gaga to put her in her music vid. She is notoriously bad-behaved on sets and Gaga is a notorious hard worker. Maybe she thinks she’ll be able to save her. Trying to save anyone is always a huge disappointment, and we’ve all had enough Lilo comeback/”She’s back!” disappointments for a lifetime.
Secondly, Gaga’s next album will be titled ARTPOP, an acronym for “Artistic Revolution Through the Potential of Pop.” She even tattooed it on her arm and took a picture of it to release to her fans at littlemonsters.com. I know Gaga is talented, we all do. She’s the credible popstar who is actually involved in the composition, writing and theme of each of her albums. And for this we are grateful. However, it will be interesting to see if this is going to be another “Born This Way” uplifting, accept yourself anthem-y album, or if she’ll break out some dance hits like her first 2 albums, “The Fame” and my personal Gaga favorite “The Fame Monster”. We all know Gaga is one for absolute artistic expression, so it’s all up in the air until we hear it. Let’s keep our fingers crossed that she doesn’t take a seriously left field turn with ARTPOP, because having Gaga on the dance floor is always a delight.
Girl, your skin is flawless. Image via mmva.muchmusic.com
Carly Rae Jepsen is 26. What. the. fuck.
WHAT THE WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you kidding me? Seriously? Come again? Carly Rae Jepsen is 26 years old. Whoa whoa whoa. I thought she was 15!!!! My mind is blown. We all know it’s a catchy song, but Jesus. Is a 26 year old really singing the teen anthem for phone calls? Moreover, this bitch can go to BARS?! Where are the drunk pictures of her stumbling out of Canadian bars (didn’t know she was Canadian either!)??? Maybe she doesn’t party, but shit. She probably does. She’s 26 and she has number 1 single in many countries around the globe. She’s probably getting so many free drugs and bottles it’s obscene.
It’s such a simple song and a simple message, that it’s almost kind of weird that she’s 26 and not 15. Definitely an appropriate teen anthem, but for the love of god, 26?! I’m weirded out. Shouldn’t you have more complex things to sing about by that age? Has she lived in a bubble? And hasn’t she learned to tell people to fucking call her instead of asking with indecision? Nobody likes a wimp. Pick a dude, tell him he’s in girl. You got enough looks for that. Change the song to “Fucking Call Me Dick (But Only If You Have A Job)” and then it will be age appropriate.
Chillwave as fuuuuuuck. Love it. I wanna sit on a beanbag inside Dntel’s Jimmy Tamborello‘s head while he’s playing music. So so so so so out of this world cool. Ps the dog in the video is trippin.
Two of my favorite people, and a microphone. Can you imagine if James Figurine produced a Lady Gaga Album? Holy shit, madness. Image via blogs.laweekly.com
Can we take a moment to relive the EPIC amazingness of this Britney Spears Pepsi commercial from back in the day. This may be my favorite commercial of all time. No joke. The song sounds just like her pop music, there’s dancing and costume changes, and beverages are being shared! What’s not to love?
2PF 