Olympics: What the fuck NBC!!!

Image via extratv.com

NBC is SO dropping the ball with the Olympics coverage of London 2012.

First of all, why would they want to impede ANYONE from seeing the beauty that is the olympic athletes? Good lord, those men and women are supa fine. Ryan Lochte, however mundane yet innocent his twitter feed may be, is one good lookin’ piece of gold medal history. And the swimmers! Ye Shiwen just broke a world record AND was faster than all the boys, all at 16! (Of course now there are doping allegations. But fuck that until it’s proven bitches, cuz ladies rule and boys are slow)

Second, the Olympics are a world game. It’s supposed to be a global celebration of sport that we can all enjoy and root for our countries. But how are we supposed to do that when NBC has the absolute worst producers ever? I don’t wanna watch Jeopardy Kids in the middle of the day. Where are the game reruns bitches?! Thanks to not being able to mold my schedule to the shitty NBC scheduling of the Olympics, I missed women’s gymnastics which is THE SHIT. Who knows how many countless people are feeling the same strife.

I bet they use Internet Explorer over at NBC. Figures. Image via fitperez.com

Now, you’d think “Hey, it’s the age of the internet! They must be live streaming and uploading videos of the games to rewatch constantly!” NOPE. In an attempt to show my friend the AWFUL London opening ceremony, I was aghast. The footage was nowhere to be found. Not on NBC’s website and not in any pages I could find in the days following the ceremony.But lo and behold, Beijing’s was on NBC’s website. Thank God, because that’s fucking relevant!

On top of that, you have to have a specific cable subscription to live stream on the internet. Is NBC in such bad shape that they can’t afford to live stream the Olympics?  Would they not make more money from running live streaming internet ads? Who dropped the ball on this?! It’s 2012 for God sakes. You can watch your neighbor jerk off on a webcam, but for some ungodly reason you can’t find good Olympic coverage on the internet. SO. LAME.

Let’s hope another big network gets the games next time, because this is excruciating. Feel free to voice annoyances over at their lackluster twitter!


MPLS and St. Paul are the healthiest metro area in the country

According to the American College of Sports Medicine, MSP has got it goin’ ON in the fitness n’ health biz. And it’s true. There are so many bikers running stop signs and getting hit by cars. Blacking out from bike accidents fights carbs!

But fo real, kudos to all in MSP for keepin’ one healthy metro area.

Next: How about NO to the new stadium for the Vikings? We’re in a recession, HELLO! Wtf. We need another sports stadium like Kim Kardashian needs another televised and scripted wedding ceremony, like Lindsay Lohan needs free drugs, like Britney needs a shaved head again. NO.

Here’s what I say, MPLS government folky-folks:

More light rails! They give us better public transportation and even offer free rides on heavy drinking holidays with MillerCoors which is SO helpful and nice. Seriously. Thank you.

More dance clubs! Fitness at night baby!

Less sports stadiums. There are at least 5 that I can think of, and none of them are winning teams, like EVER. It doesn’t make any sense. The Metrodome is old, but come on. It’s a bad idea. That money could do something better for our community. You know it, I know it. Just, STOP it!

MSP is the healthiest metro in country, says American College of Sports Medicine – Minneapolis News – The Blotter.

Puppy Bowl VIII: What Super Bowl Sunday is really all about

Photo via animalplanet.com
Photo by David S. Holloway via animalplanet.com

I LOVE the Puppy Bowl. I think it’s one of the most genius things Animal Planet has ever done. Honestly. If you haven’t watched the Puppy Bowl because you’re a diehard football fan, or your just haven’t ever seen it, it will change your life. Not really, but it’s the cutest thing in the entire world.

First, the puppies are on teams and run around a small “field” with a chew toy football trying to “score points” (run around like puppies and look cute). Sometimes there’s pee, I’m sure there’s been a poo or two, but that’s just part of the fun.

Then, at halftime, the most amazing thing ever happens: The Kitty Halftime show. Kittys are placed on the field with kitty-like toys, but they all look frightened and pissed off and basically don’t do anything but hiss at things. It’s so joyous!

The animals are all provided by animal shelters that deal in pet adoptions. So not only is the Puppy Bowl amazing, but it also promotes pet adoption to (hopefully) loving families. What’s not to love!!!

Photos via animalplanet.com