Christian Bale, what a guy!

Image via Facebook

Here is Christian Bale, star of The Dark Knight Rises and Newsies, meeting with Carey Rottman, one of the Aurora shooting victims. What a guy. So effing cool that he went there to visit, and reportedly on his own without representing Warner Brothers.

Advertisements

Celebrité: So Lady Gaga has a perfume now

Image via Facebook

Lady Gaga’s got a p-p-perfume

With the 24 hour news cycle and not really giving a shit, I totally forgot that Lady Gaga was making a perfume. I’m not sure she ever confirmed it or even commented on the rumor going around that it was going to smell like semen and blood. What a weird rumor to start. Seriously. Who the fuck thinks about spraying blood and semen on themselves, and then pushes the idea on a tad bit left of center pop star’s perfume idea? I bet it was someone in Hollywood who is balding and hates their life, and probably has an egg mcmuffin twice a week. Pathetic.

Image via crushable.com

From first look, I’m not totally appalled at the packaging. The box looks nice in its black and gold coloring. The lid for some reason makes me think of Lady Gaga’s hair and how nutty and over the top it can be. Like a fancier version of the hair bow she used to wear back in her heydey as a rising star. I can almost see a pair of sunglasses peeking out from under the gold top. The black liquid looks pretty cool, except why the fuck is it black? Is that shit gonna stain? Probably not, that would be a pretty awful design flaw.

I will say this: I hope it doesn’t smell like vanilla like every other god damn celebrity perfume. Justin Bieber, Beyonce, J.Lo, Britney, Paris, Selena Gomez, Katy Perry and every one else. Vanilla. I guess if Gaga’s smelled like semen and blood it would at least be thinking outside of the box. Kim Kardashian has one, right? Does it smell like a business pyramid scheme and self-absorbed pee fetishes? I wish. Then I would TOTALLY buy it. Ke$ha’s will probably smell like that too, but with a little more essence of beard and whiskey-sweat tour bus balls.

Also, I guess you ain’t shit unless you have a perfume. Noted.

Image via Facebook

Minneapolis: Citibank Cancels Foreclosure Auction of Minneapolis Mom’s Home

There’s power in the people, fighting the good fight. Some good news in a world of bad. A mother’s home was saved by protesting and getting Citibank to commit to loan modification. It seems lame to thank Citibank, because taking peoples’ homes away after giving out a bunch of terrible-idea loans over the past decade seems like a wholly dick move, and it is. Thankfully someone with half a brain over there in the banking industry did the right thing in letting this woman pay back the loan instead of taking her house.

Click the link to read the whole story below. YAY!!!

11th Hour Victory!:Citibank Cancels Foreclosure Auction of Minneapolis Mom’s Home; Commits to Loan Modification With Reduced Payments | Occupy Homes MN.

Music: Lady Gaga suffers concussion AND finishes concert

Image via wikimedia

This lady is solid gold. At a concert in New Zealand, an unlucky backup dancer smacked our Lady of Gaga in the head with a metal pole, giving her a concussion. No worries though, she went on to finish the rest of the 16 songs for the show. Ho.LY. Moly.

Lady Gaga concussion

I get a headache and I feel utterly debilitated, and this bitch is finished hours of songs with a concussion. I need to get to her level, STAT!

I don’t know what it would take for her to NOT finish a concert. Apocalypse? Broken legs? Al Queda? She’d probably still finished “Bad Romance” because that’s how baller she is.

Work it Lady G. Hope your head feels better!!

10 Terrifying Reasons Why You Should NEVER Get High On Bath Salts

I fucking love bath salts. Not for a weird high, but for my skin in the bathtub. Imma be pissed if crazy bitches who can’t just do the regular drugs ruin my bath experience by gettin’ this shit banned at stores. This may be one of them few few few times in my life where the sentence “Why can’t you just snort crack?” makes perfect and logical sense. Don’t snort bath salts y’all, just sprinkle them in your tub for smooth skin. Pick up a bottle of wine if you must. Trust me, it’s a lot nicer than snorting bath salts and eating a man’s face, and then being shot to death. Cheap wine ain’t that bad.

Next these turd munches will snort roasted beet salads and stolen truffle oil for their fix. Fuck that. Please don’t snort things I love.

10 Terrifying Reasons Why You Should NEVER Get High On Bath Salts.

Pocahontas is cool and One Million Moms is the dumbest shit alive

This shit is so fucking good. Pocahontas is so wise. Can you imagine this song being in any children’s movie nowadays? Those bigoty losers over at One Million Moms (more like one million shit bombs) would probably deem it inappropriate. I don’t know why, but crazy bitches can always find something wrong with anything. I don’t know about you, but right-wing, religious, bigoty nuts who probably have their own “Bleach Your Asshole At Home!” kits are not my cup of tea.

BAH yes! Image via imeanwhat.com

These are the same bitches who got mad at JCPenny for hiring Ellen-ELLEN- to be a spokeswoman for their half-assed brand. How can anyone who isn’t the most evil person alive not like Ellen? Seriously. Think about it. She dances! She wears Keds! What’s not to like? Fuck them. Pocahontas and Ellen are the baddest gals in town.

Also, can somebody start an activism group called “One Million Toms” that’s just a shit ton of gay dudes half-nakedly dancing to episodes of Ellen? They can call whomever OMM is protesting that week and ask for the opposite. “We LOVE the sexually explicit content on your primetime show. More nipples and bare ass plz!” PLEASE make this happen, anyone with time and money for activism, and preferably the first name Tom.