Infuriation: Celebrity marriages and divorces

Photo via radaronline.com
Photo via radaronline.com

EVIDENCE:

  • Demi Moore is in the hospital while Ashton Kutcher is drunk and partying at fashion shows and a Florence + the Machine concert in Brazil. (What the fuck is wrong with Ashton Kutcher. He’s gross.)
  • Kim Kardashian will reveal the moment she broke things off with Kris Humphries this Sunday on E!
  • Tabloids are making things up left and right and Katy Perry and Russell Brand: Sex addictions, drinking problems, tell-all books, etc.
Yuck. A cheater is one of the lowest form of humans, right above murderer and twilight fan. Photo via snarkfood.com
Yuck. Take all that money girl. A cheater is one of the lowest forms of humans, right above murderers and twilight moms. Photo via snarkfood.com

Breakups are super gross, for real. But the divorce rate in Hollywood disgusts me. It’s nearly every week some other marginally talented celebrity is getting press because their relationship is crumbling due to crazy infidelity, or the fact that they didn’t really know each other in the first place.

Can you imagine MARRYING someone you had only known for a year? Let alone six months? I’ve had iffy relationships with crappy hair dryers longer than some celebrities get married and divorced.

Relationships and marriage are very, very hard work. I won’t sit here and judge people who couldn’t honestly work out their differences and decided to get a quiet divorce. But when real-life marriage and divorce seems like little more than something to fill the tabloids and get a quick paycheck, one starts to wonder what the real motives are behind these fanatical relationships in Hollywood. (COUGH COUGH Kim Kardashian!)

This story line is SO played out, Hollywood. Like, shitty Katherine Heigl romantic comedy played out. Can’t we go back to plastic surgery accusations or something? It’s a little less soul-crushing than constant divorce battles.

What do you think about marriage in Hollywood?

This is cool: M.I.A.

A new single is upon us. 01/31/2012

P.S. I love the way she probably does this cover herself. Hawt!

Fashion: Shit Fashion Girls Say

So many spawns, so many great (and so true) videos. These are my absolute favorites so far though. There’s even a part 2!!!

“Grace Coddington is the unsung hero of ‘The September Issue’.”

 

“She kept calling it ‘Rodart’.” “She looked like ‘Grey Gardens’.”

Fashion: Jean-Paul Gaultier and Amy Winehouse

I still can't believe she's gone. Rest in Peace, beautiful girl. Photo via covermesongs.com
I still can't believe she's gone. Rest in Peace, beautiful girl. Photo via covermesongs.com

 The death of amazing singer Amy Winehouse left us all with a little hole in our soul parts. However, her memory will be honored in Jean-Paul Gaultier’s SS 2012 show, as she is the muse who inspired his new line.

The hair is styled like her signature beehive (tear!) and the clothes mimic Amy’s legendary 50s and 60s style.

Gaultier comments on Amy’s inspiring style, saying that “What she stands for above all, is uniqueness. Both in music and the way she dressed, she mixed a great many influences.”

Photo via news.com.au

Photo via news.com.au

Amazing: Breakthrough in invisibility cloak, Harry Potter fans rejoice

WHAT the serious what!?

Soon we'll all look like floating heads. Also, screw diets! Photo via telegraph.co.uk
Soon we'll all look like floating heads. Also, screw diets! Photo via telegraph.co.uk

A breakthrough has been made in invisibility cloak technology. I know people, I know. HOLY FUCKING SHIT.

According to BBC, “Researchers have “cloaked” a three-dimensional object, making it invisible from all angles, for the first time. However, the demonstration works only for waves in the microwave region of the electromagnetic spectrum. It uses a shell of what are known as plasmonic materials; they present a “photo negative” of the object being cloaked, effectively cancelling it out.” Awesome. What a great beginning to cloakdom. Someday people, it will be ours.

Can you imagine, invisibility cloaks in actual life? People are gonna get into so much trouble, it’s gonna be hilarious.

Firstly, Harry Potter role-play will get even more realistic. Also, can you imagine the show “Cheaters” with invisibility cloaks? Knives coming out of nowhere, punches to the face from invisible sources and gun shots appearing out of nowhere. That sounds pretty dangerous actually.

Maybe monogamy will make a comeback simultaneously with the invention of the invisibility cloak. “I’m going to follow you, and if I catch you cheating, I’m going to murder you both horribly.” It’s what Jesus would have wanted.

This is cool: Shit Liz Lemon Says

We’ve all seen the ‘Shit someone Says’ videos, which are mostly hilarious and very true. Now comes the motherload of all motherloads: “Shit Liz Lemon Says” CLICK THE LINK to CHECK IT OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Photo via lemonadvice.tumblr.com

Yesteryear: Midnight Society


Submitted for the approval of the Midnight Society, I call this story… The Tale of the Underemployed Girl.

Photo via tvacres.com

Beauty: Mint Sherbet nail color for spring

If you haven’t heard pastels are in for spring, then you’ve been working too hard.

This color from Sally Hansen called Mint Sherbet is the real deal. It’s the perfect mint pastel color for your nails and superbly shiny.

Plus, Lady Gaga predicted in her video for “Marry the Night” that mint would be a huge color in fashion this spring, and her word is law. So what are you waiting for?!

Photo via sallyhansen.com

Celebrité: Selena Gomez goes to the Congo

Selena Gomez in Valparaíso, Chile. Photo via unicef.org
Selena Gomez in Valparaíso, Chile. Photo via unicef.org

Can we get a Disney special out of this please?!

Selena Gomez will be going to the Democratic Republic of Congo as UNICEF ambassador sometime in April. Her previous work as a UNICEF ambassador sent her to Ghana and Valparaíso, Chile to promote early childhood development and awareness. Yay for her!

I really wanna see Selena Gomez make volunteering and social awareness something cool to do with the crazy kids and tweens of the day. Wouldn’t that be amazing? Her, maybe Justin Beiber, and a concert/documentary event on the Congo. Show that to a bunch of annoying teens who thought they were going to scream their lungs out to “Baby” instead being mortified at how not-first world some people live. Maybe they (and some young adults) would stop being upset about not having $500 iPads.

You know, Twilight was based on a true story in... Africa... Photo via wisc.edu
Tweens and some hopefully embarrassed adults at the Twilight premiere. Photo via wisc.edu

Kudos to Selena for doing something positive with her celebrité!! Now if she can only get an MTV or Disney TV specials to inspire her legions of followers to do good. There’s GOTTA be a way to market volunteering and humanitarian awareness to screaming, hormone-crazed teens. Wouldn’t it be great if kids and teens were throwing tantrums over their parents not donating enough to poverty and famine in Africa?! Probably in a billion years. But Never Say Never.