Music: Taylor Swift’s new album “Red” is instantly iconic

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I stand corrected. This bitch is ON TOP. Image via justjared.com

Watch me eat every single bad word I have ever said about Taylor Swift. Her latest album Red is pretty much the best album I’ve heard in a very long time. Sure, she’s got a weird and crazy love life. But she knows how to make amazing records from it (and to be fair, every celebrity and human being has a fucked up love life).

The thing I’ve come to realize in liking Taylor Swift’s Red is that she is arguably the most talented person in pop music right now. Nuff said.

Red is an eclectic mix of alt rock, pop and a little bit of country. She channels U2, then Stevie Nicks, then maybe a little Regina Spektor, then Katy Perry. And the cool thing is that it never feels tired or contrived. It’s bold and honest and still really fun. It’s the album any pop star would kill to put out, because she drew inspiration across MANY genres but made it work like the baddest bitch ever. I want to close the doors to my room and do some soul-searching/dancing to this album, because that’s how good it is. I shouldn’t be surprised that it’s good, it’s just that I’m surprised that I love it so much already. This is her best album to date and I cannot stress how good this album is. Do yourself a favor and get it.

Here are some really noteworthy tracks, although to be honest the entire album is comprised of noteworthy tracks.

All Too Well

“All Too Well” is alleged to be about Jake Gyllenhaal, and holy shit. It cuts pretty deep. “Maybe we got lost in translation/ maybe I asked for too much/ but maybe this thing was a masterpiece til you tore it all up” and “you call me up again just to break me like a promise/so casually cruel in the name of being honest/I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here/ because I remember it all too well.” Ok, girlfriend is fucking growing up, and I am fangirling the shit out of her 20 something love life songs like a new Spice Girls album release in the 90s. This song is amazing.

I Knew You Were Trouble

Um. Yeah. That’s Taylor Swift doing Katy Perry better than Katy Perry. This song is gonna be fucking HUGE. The melodies are spot on and remind me of late 90s/early 00s pop music. This song is baller af.

State of Grace

This is her U2 inspired song. And it totally fucking works.

Begin Again Live

This song is really sweet and reminds me of early Sheryl Crow for some reason.

THIS IS REALLY HAPPENING: Ashlee Simpson to release bad album

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Image via celeblowdown.com. What the fuck look is she going for here.

GO TO HER WEBSITE. WATCH AND LISTEN. WHO SAID THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA? Oh, dear God. The quiet, festering death crash and burn of this new Ashlee Simpson album is going to be insane. There’s a countdown on her website. Last time I checked, anyone my age who listened to Ashlee Simpson in the confusing days of high school does not ever listen to her anymore. Not even as a joke. This girl is so uncool that nobody would even be listening ironically (i hate that sentence, but you know it’s true).

EVIDENCE this will blow

She got caught lip-synching on SNL (which is the first thing that pops up on youtube after you type her name in), and by the way it is painful every time to watch. She used to have a reality tv show on MTV. She was married to and then divorced to Pete Wentz from Fall Out Boy who hasn’t really done anything musically in yeeeears. She had a baybay. Two years ago, She was rumored to be working on a folk album. A FOLK ALBUM. A nose job, a short haircut. WHO IDENTIFIES WITH YOU. She seriously might be a sociopath. Think about it: if she was actually cool, then she’d know that she isn’t cool. The more you know.

Taylor Swift continues her ex-boyfriend bashing on new single

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How does she keep dating people?! Why is anyone dating her? She throws every ex under the bus in a hit single. Which must be an awesome feeling for her. And for us to live vicariously through a successful scorned woman singing number one hits is kind of cool. We’ve all got some people to sing this song to. But girlfriend better start making some different songs besides “You Are The Biggest Piece of Shit I’ve Ever Seen” and “I Will Literally Ruin Your Career (Joe Jonas)”.

As for the single, it’s not bad. Produced by Max Martin I expected a little more oomph, but what can you really do with a girl who needs to stay with basic instruments because of her country background? I’d like to hear an electronica version of it, because this version sound like a watery song made just for radio (duh) but that makes the song so boring. Why do radio stations love light guitar,light drums, an ok melody and an ok voice? The world may never know.

Foiled yet again! Justin Timberlake NOT releasing new album

Posted on by 20poorandfabulous
Instead of making music, Justin is playing pretend in Ken wigs in his backyard. Or something. Image via justjared.com

Just like the sands of time, rumors of a new Justin Timberlake album have resurfaced into our lives. And, just like disappointing fellatio, JT takes any hope of musical cunnilingus out of our dry, tired hands.

Come on, JT. Give the people what they want. Cornrows, amazing costumes and Timbaland-produced beats. With every passing year, the pressure and excitement grows. Which is probably annoying for him, and definitely excruciating for us. It’s like a boner that won’t ever stop, and won’t ever see a beautiful, majestic release.

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JT. Do it for all the boners in America. We are dying.

The new No Doubt single is fucking awesome

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Image via swotti.starmedia.com

Here’s the new single in case you haven’t heard it!! This is really exciting. It still has a No Doubt flavor and a sweet sweet melody. The new video drops tonight on E! I will definitely be listening to this song on repeat. I can’t wait for their album Push and Shove to come out in September!! I will bleed myself dry for tickets to this show. A MUST.

Listen: The xx release new single “Angels”

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Image via clashmusic.com

The xx’s new song “Angels” is suuuuper pretty. What else would you expect?

Listen: The Killers’ “Runaways”

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The Killers are always worth a good listen. They bring back so many memories. Love these guys forever.

Kinda reminiscent of Springsteen in the chorus, no?!

Listen: Passion Pit: “Constant Conversations”

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Image via prettymuchamazing.com

This is the best the Passion Pit singer, Michael Angelakos, has ever been. It actually sounds like singing as opposed to the sort of pop yell over electro tracks. This is a light, airy track that is perfect for strolling on a sunny day in the best way ever. I can’t wait to hear the rest of the album. Gossamer is out July 24.

Catch them on tour this summer!!

Passion Pit 2012 Spring Dates / Summer Festivals

6/2 Dallas, TX Meltdown Music Festival
6/22 Boston, MA Bank of America Pavilion
6/23 New York, NY Governors Ball Music Festival
7/15 Cincinnati, OH Bunbury Music Festival
7/20-22 Dover, DE Firefly Music Festival
8/3-5 Chicago, IL Lollapalooza
8/5 Montreal, QC Osheaga Music Festival
8/7 Morrison, CO Red Rocks Amphitheater (co-headline w/ Justice)
8/10-12 San Francisco, CA Outside Lands Music Festival
9/9 Los Angeles, CA Hollywood Bowl (co-headline w/ Hot Chip)

Passion Pit: “Constant Conversations” | Tracks | Pitchfork.

Music: The Killers debut new album cover

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Image via Facebook

Hells to the yeah. This looks SO Killers-esque. Glam Nevada. Love it.

This is the single cover for their song “Runaways” from their album Battleborn that will be in our graces this fall. CAN’T WAIT! No Doubt and the Killers? This fall is gonna be the shit.

Listen: Purity Ring’s new single “Fineshrine”

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Image via gorillavsbear.net

Purity Ring is going on tour with Dirty Projectors this year. And from what I’ve heard, I’m into their electronic phazy haze shit. Like you’re the coolest bitch in your dream and everyone must pulsate to your blood flow because you are queen, but you’re over it. Yeah? If you like, download the single here!!