O Rly? Newt Gingrich is outta the race for the GOP

Image via businessinsider.com

Farewell, Newt! He’s officially out of the race to be our dear leader.

He liked the moon and hated everyone else. But to be honest, the moon shit woulda been awesome. But there are real problems earthbound my friend, that we must attend to first. Like energy, food and what to do with the Kardashians.

May you find solace in reruns of Parks and Recreation and takeout from Noodles & Company, like the rest of us.

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Read: Why Rick Santorum Would Have Killed My Daughter

A must read.

“Though he has no medical training, and no business commenting on the medical decisions that women and their doctors make, he argues that such tests shouldn’t be provided, or that employers at least should be allowed to opt out of paying for them on ‘moral grounds.'”

Yeah, what the hell is up with Santorum and his opinions on sex, women, abortions and medical issues he has absolutely no degree in? He has never studied medicine. A government leader should not bring these topics up as American issues based on solely their religious beliefs. Being a Christian (insert any belief system here) does not make you and your religious opinions better than knowing actual science. It’s all sorts of wrong. He’s supposed to run a government, not our uteruses nor our lives. Why do these fart faces get attention? Seriously! This is the best republicans could come up with?

Why Rick Santorum Would Have Killed My Daughter.

Obama is SO getting a second term if this is the turd he’s up against. WHAT ABOUT THE ECONOMY AND FOREIGN POLICIES, SANTORUM?! HMM? Are you the maler, more Christian, less gun-ny and more uterus-obsessed Sarah Palin? Quick, where’s Russia!!!! Seriously, all he talks about is uteruses and how much he hates the people around them and loves the fetuses inside them.

Fetus Fetish: The Rick Santorum Story.

Santorum, stay outta my sex life and uterus (this is a way disgusting sentence). Jesus!

What a freak moron.

Hey Santorum, stay outta my sex life

Photo via thinkprogress.org

In more ways than one, please.

So I guess presidential hopeful(ly not) Rick Santorum cares about our sex lives, folks.

“…the whole sexual libertine idea… It’s not okay because it’s a license to do things in the sexual realm that is counter to how things are supposed to be.”

Oh pray tell, Mr. Santorum!

…[sex] becomes deconstructed to the point where it’s simply pleasure. And that’s certainly a part of it–and it’s an important part of it, don’t get me wrong–but there’s a lot of things we do for pleasure, and this is special, and it needs to be seen as special.”

Um, hello. A politician named Rick Santorum is not seriously talking to us about the decency of sex, is he? Sure, the last name is an easy and ironic target, but politician mixed with sexual moral high ground is also a frothy mixture best left hidden in cheap hotel bathrooms.