Dream shoes: Jeffrey Campbell will murder ur life in these platforms

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Yeah these are pretty weird which means they are cool as fuck. It’s good to wear weird shit though because weird shit starts conversations and makes you feel like a billion pennies. PLUS, these platforms by shoe god Jeffrey Campbell come with a secret door where you can hide candy, weed cigarettes or your business card when you’re out on the town and trying to spread your game.

P.S. I don’t know what kind of actual psycho would stuff them with confetti instead of snacks. Total freaks, that’s who.

Jeffrey Campbell Jadis-Door Platforms, $255

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Fashion: Abba Platform

Image via Nasty Gal

I love it more because the name ABBA is in it. They even, dare I say, look kinda comfy? At least for heely type things! Plus, just imagine how lightweight they are since they are made from cork! But fo real, $115 for cork shoes?! Are you kidding me? That’s like charging a shit load of money for a cardboard dress. What the what. Anyways, these would look sweet under a long skirt, colorful top and hair in a bun on top of the head. Right?!