Hate to break it to you, but that “maybe sometime” relationship you’ve been keeping in your back pocket is totally fucked up.
Some people are so into this. They probably saw it in an episode of Friends and thought it was a “real neat” idea. ‘If you don’t find the love of your life, marry someone who’s more pathetic so you don’t feel bad about not finding anyone better.’ Harsh! Why would anyone set themselves up for this amazing disaster?
Cue Katherine Heigl filming this exact storyline. Except in her version, she actually falls in love with her fallback, and her fallback falls in love with her, despite her bad wigs. A true Hollywood love story.
Face it: It ain’t gonna happen. Why even have a fallback relationship? Would you really be that much happier with someone you didn’t care to date at your best and most mediocre of moments in life? The “maybe sometime” person is just a façade. Someone you think of when you’re afraid of being lonely, but not someone you think of when you picture a happy life and a good relationship.
At this point in our lives, and the way relationships have progressed throughout the years, we have a loooong time to figure out who we want to end up with. Unless you’re one of those 20 somethings that got married at 21, in which case, congratulations (and fuck you. Just kidding! kind of).
So there’s no rush. But I’m just sayin, don’t peg someone as your backup. Give them, and YOU a chance to find your very own Ryan Gosling or Rachel McAdams. Because they are awesome and mostly everyone, save total idiots, deserve a Ryan Gosling or a Rachel McAdams.