Maybe Mattel should start coming out with more realistic Barbie scenarios for young girls, to give them of little preview of what’s to come in life. Instead of dream houses and amazing careers, how about these:
Coke Hangover Barbie: Because you shouldn’t do drugs from a stranger in a club
Lost Your Job Barbie: Because the economy took a nasty downturn
Pregnancy Scare Barbie: Because Ken is a dipshit and didn’t wear a fucking condom. Murder him for insurance money, then use it for the abortion
Breakup Barbie: Ken’s threatening double-suicide and has a copy of all your keys
Period Cramps Barbie: WHERE’S THE FUCKING ICE CREAM KEN
Can’t Pay Rent Barbie: Hookin’ on the streets for cash
Alcoholic Barbie: Beats Ken within an inch of his life when he takes the last of the gin
Yay for toys!
2PF 